I've never been someone to look forward to things...I learned early in life that is somethings best "not done" by someone like me...it leaves me open to disapointment.
Everything that had been my goal or my salvation, didn't appear. I know what you're thinking...and it's true. I didn't work hard enough, i didn't focus and I let myself be pulled off the journey by others wants and dreams...well that is over, and the focus is on me.
I can't live someone elses life, I can't fix their issues or them...I can only work on me...and that's what I'm doing. Sometimes I lose motivation, sometimes I just can't get up and out of bed, sometimes there's no stopping me...it all depends on the day, hour or minute I'm living in.